Another Sanderson Oneshot
by Iresol
Summary: Ok, this takes place right after my Fathers and Sons, and is told from Sanderson's view. There may be mild language.


Author's Note, Ok, so this picks up where "Fathers and Sons" leaves off, but this is told from Sanderson's point of view. And it's a one shot. But I was bored and it was Saturday. Enjoy and review.

North Georgia was nothing compared to New England. It was hotter then hell and humid, there were bugs all over, and cows.

I swear to God everyone had a pet cow.

But at 2:30 in the morning it was wonderful. There were no cops on the road, which let me get in and out of base quickly. Plus the McDonalds was open twenty-four hours.

Through the first three months of Humera's pregnancy I had checked labels and made sure everything she ate was good. Now I didn't care, whatever held her over longest.

With Hoot on the phone with his woman, I pulled up to that drive through speaker, "What do you want?"

He peeked at the menu, like he needed to, "Big Mac." Stitches bright as day in his forehead.

Over the speaker came someone, either male or female, I couldn't tell, "Welcome to McDonalds, how may I help you?"

"Hey. What is the biggest thing on your menu?" I asked, my wife had sent me out for food since I was going out. And I was making one trip out tonight. Hoot was lucky the E.R. was close to the hospital.

"Oh! And one of those salad shaker things for McKnight."

I looked across the car at him, he grinned. I didn't even want to know. Whenever Diana was out at work the two-butted heads like fucking mountain goats.

Over the speaker came, "That would be a Quarter Pounder with Cheese sir."

"Wonderful. Give me three of those with fries. A Big Mac. And one of those salad shaker things."

"With lite ranch dressin," Hoot added.

I looked back across the car at him, "When he kicks your ass I am not driving you to the hospital again!"

Hoot flipped me off, "He did not kick my ass. He threw a lamp at me."

I then told the clown shaped speaker I wanted lite ranch.

The male or female told me what sounded like something under twenty bucks. I drove through to the first window where a beautiful three hundred pound woman with a hair net, smoking a cigarette waited.

Hoot jumped in surprise at the sight of her, she winked at him though.

Both of us managed to dig out seventeen eighty-three.

Then I drove to the second window where our food waited. Hoot peeked in his bag and grinned at the low fat salad dressing. I rolled my eyes and made him hold the three other bags.

On the way home Hoot committed a sin, he ate some of Humera's fry's.

"If you eat all her fries I'll kick your ass. And then I'll feed you to me wife," I told him.

Hoot made a face, then used a fry to point at the road, "Concentrate on driving. I don't wanna die bringin McKnight his midnight snack."

"A salad?"

Hoot nodded, "He has high cholesterol and I have to be sure he doesn't break his diet when my woman is out."

I glanced over to look at Hoot, who had the largest damn smile on his face. "Could you at least say that with a straight face?"

Hoot began to laugh, "I can't help it man." Whether it was lack of sleep or perfect blackmail material, he was just plain thrilled. I turned the corner and slowed down as the base came closer, but the guards recognized me and waved me in.

I waved back and drove through the base, dropped Hoot off at his house. With his Big Mac and Salad Shaker. After I reminded him I was not making any trips to the E.R. again tonight.

Then I drove down the street to my house.

Where my wife waited, I'd put the Disney Channel on for her, it was safe. No death or killing. Not only was she hungry, but now she was hormonal. She would cry if she saw a dead animal or if we ran out of soda.

I parked, grabbed the three bags, and climbed out of the car. Careful not to lock the keys in it again. I made my way through the garden she had planted, up into the porch and inside.

To my horror she sat on the couch, sobbing.

I closed the door with my foot, some sort of cartoon was on the TV. She looked up from where she was seated on the couch in the living room, tears streaming down her face. She pointed at the TV, "The baby whale got separated from the mommy whale and the baby whale tried to call the mommy whale but she didn't hear the baby whale, but he could see his mommy and he tried to follow her but he couldn't."

Oh God, no more Disney Channel.

I quickly made my way across the living room, she pointed to the TV, "It's sad."

"Well sweetie, darling, angel, love of my life, lets just change the channel," I suggested, setting down the bags. I looked around for the remote and found it on the coffee table.

Humera peeked in one of the bags and her mood changed in a millisecond.

"Oh! French fries!" She beamed.

I dropped down on the couch while she pulled out a carton of fries, then dug through and found one of the burgers. I switched the channel. Looking for something that wouldn't upset her.

Once I found the Weather Channel, I tossed the remote and leaned over, I kissed her bump, and then her forehead. "I love you sweetie."

She smiled, while she chewed her burger, "How's Hoot?"

I gave her thumbs up and laid down on the couch. She moved the bags to the coffee table and pulled my legs up onto her lap. She then patted my crotch.

"Sweetie, not now, I'm too tired."

She rolled her eyes, took another bite of her burger, and then offered me a fry.

I shook my head. Instead I grabbed a pillow from the floor and put it behind my head, "Wake me up when you're done. Make sure everything is put away."

Again she rolled her eyes, but without a mouthful of food she told me, "Not

that, perv. Your fly is open."

I waved her off, eyes closed, "I don't care."

"I love you baby," she told me, and then wedged her fries between my legs.


End file.
